A is for ...

Ah! No time to post right now. I will try to get back to this as soon as I can. I've got to get this all out somewhere.

Put in my place

On Thursday I came home from work feeling a little green due to stomach virus. I thought I'd have a bit of a rest on the couch before starting the late afternoon/evening routine. This was promptly vitoed though by Master Three who put his face very close to mine and said "Mummy you have to get up and start cooking!"

Seems my role has been clearly defined.

3 years and 1 month old

I've made a resolution to blog more, so to ease myself back into it here is an entry largely made up of images.

My first boy turned 3 on the 3rd of March. THREE! Happy Belated birthday my gorgeous, cheeky, beautiful, naughty, energetic three year old.


0... 1... 2... 3...

Fresh out of the oven - about 1 hour old.


One year old.


Two years old.


Three years old.

*!%$*!*##!!!

I wanna run away from home.

Today has been so shitful I just cannot wait until it's over. Had a difficult night with JM, who is cutting two teeth. He spent most of the night screaming his head off. This morning I had to have a blood test. I asked Mum to mind the boys while I went because I know I'd have to chase them around with a needle still pumping blood out of my arm.

I picked them up and while I was strapping the baby into his seat, the toddler decided to make a great escape and managed to run a house down Mum's street in the space of 2 seconds. He can now get out of his baby seat. What fun!

Get home and JM decides it's time to start yet another marathon whinge fest. I put on a DVD for JA to keep him amused because if I dared to put JM down for a second for a chance to, oh I don't know, go to the loo he screamed blue murder. He simply refused to go down for a nap despite the fact that he was extremely tired due to his lack of sleep the night before. He was still whinging when I held him but his volume control was only set to about 7 rather than the 5000 it was when he was not in my arms. Managed to get lunch into them, making sandwiches with the one hand while doing so. JA went down for a nap but JM refused. At this time I was developing quite a headache. Having a kid screaming in your ear for hours straight will do that. Oh, and I still haven't had a bite since breakfast.

After a time he calmed down and actually had a bit of a giggle while I played with him. This was short lived.

During all this time I have given him panadol, taken his temperature and generally made sure nothing too sinister was going on.


THEN JA started screaming for a cup of milk. I decided perhaps JM might actually go down for a nap. I made him a bottle, made a cup for JA and put the baby down in his cot with his bottle. Yes, I know very much a no no but desperate times call for desperate measures. He went down for a sleep. YAH! It was 3.30 in the afternoon but he was silent and sleeping all the same.

However, during this time JA discovered that I had left a nearly full 3 litre bottle of milk on the kitchen bench. When I was in the baby's room he decided to poor the whole freaking thing all over the kitchen floor.

My head was (is!) aching, the house an absolute mess and there was a pile of laundry waiting to be washed due to the great laundry weather we are having. I looked at the kitchen floor and, I am not ashamed to admit, burst into tears. Then I cleaned up the milk. In order to calm myself down a bit I got on the computer to just get it all out. I just know Mr Pants will get home from work and complain about the state of the house.

My Mum is coming over tonight for dinner. Roast chicken. I guess I better get started in amongst the mess. At least the baby is still sleeping.

My head hurts, my heart hurts.

One completed year!

JM, my beautiful, bubalicious delight, in an hour and 18 minutes you will have fully completed your first year of life. 8.23am was the moment you entered the world on this day a year ago.

All day yesterday while I was at work, last night and this morning I kept remembering what I was doing a year ago. I was in a bit of pain - prelabour apparently, and was very anxious to finally meet you. I was also concerned about JA, as I had never spent a great deal of time away from him since his birth and had never spent a night without him under the same roof. My bags were in the car ready to head off in the morning as the three of us had to be at the hospital at 6am. My mum was all set to come over at 5.30am to look after your big brother and despite my best intentions the house was in a bit of a state of chaos. Having had a bit of a difficult pregnancy I was unable to get as much done as I would have liked. Nesting instinct or not!

We knew you were a boy and we knew I had to have another caesarean. You were in a breech position with one leg up near your little bottom and one up near your tummy. Not at all conducive for a more traditional birth. Having had to have a caesar with your big brother I was hoping that I experience labour and birth the 'natural' way but you had other ideas. I didn't mind though. I really only cared about you arriving healthy, happy and for me to be in reasonable shape afterwards.

I remember wondering if I would be as emotional as I was the day your big brother arrived. For some odd reason I thought that because I had experienced it all before it may not be as monumental as it was the first time. I was so very wrong. The moment I heard you for the first time and the moment I saw you for the first time I was as overwhelmed as I was with your brother. The incredibly feelings of love washed over me with such force that I felt a physical reaction in my body. I was in awe at how utterly beautiful you were and remember saying "Oh wow he is so cute!". A fact that was confirmed by many hospital staff afterwards. JM, you were an exceptionally pretty newborn. You are still exceptionally beautiful.

I remember your little bottom being so tiny it reminded me of a walnut. Huggies newborn nappies just swam on you. I remember they had to keep you in the nursery under some lights for a while because your body temperature was a bit low. I remember you screaming your head off during your first bath and feeling helpless because I was in a lot of pain after the operation and couldn't comfort you the way I wanted to. I cried because you cried and I hated seeing my new little baby so upset. I remember going with you for your heel prick test because I didn't with your brother and felt guilty about it. I remember feeling like I had been stabbed myself when you cried out in pain when the midwife took the blood from your foot.

I couldn't wait to get you home so we could begin life as a family of four. I remember all your clothes swamping you. I was given a 00000 outfit as a gift for you big brother when he was a baby (and already in 00s). It was the only thing that fit your properly for a while after your birth. It is these details that remind me of how utterly tiny you were.

Tomorrow we are having family over to celebrate. So HAPPY BIRTHDAY my beautiful little boy. You are now starting to walk and it still astonishes me just how much human beings achieve in their first years of life. It is truly phenomenal.

Your Daddy, your big brother and me your loving Mummy just adore you. We love you so much darling. Have a truly exceptional birthday as you are a truly exceptional baby!

10.5 Months

Darling boy, Mama has been very slack with updating all your milestones and your general goings on but you've been living in this house and have been witness to the chaos that has prevented me from doing just that!

You are developing and growing at such a great pace that it's hard to catch up. You cut your two bottom teeth the last week of February and have just recently cut your two top teeth, last Monday in fact. Your brother's two top teeth adjacent to the middle ones cut first on the top, making him look like an extra in Buffy. I thought maybe you'd follow suit.

You are now furniture cruising with ease and practicing standing. You first stood independently for a few seconds the Sunday before Anzac day. The last couple of days however it's become a favourite past time. In fact, if I am on the floor with you and your brother you like to use a handful of my hair for a bit of support before you go solo. OUCH!!

Prior to this you've been an expert comando crawler. You like to crawl the good old fashioned way too, but have learned, for you, comando style gets you to your destination a lot faster. You look like one of the Commonwealth games swimmers in aerial view. You are just a pink blur!

I have to sheepishly and selfishly admit I was hoping you would wait a while before you became so mobile as you walking looks so imminent. It's hard keeping up with both of you as it is, with the both of you running around I will know I won't find a moment to catch my breath. As it is now I have to have a bit of a search for you if I leave a room you're in for a minute so see where you have gone. Often it's to another completely different part of the house. Little one you are FAST!

You have a great sense of humour and find so many things delightful and comical. It's a reminder for your Daddy and me that there is great joy in the little things of life.

Both you and your brother are beginning to enjoy more time together and your parents take great pleasure in watching the both of you grow up together. Despite everything that's going on we realise that this time in our lives is one of the best. Watching our beautiful boys grow and develop is an honour that we don't take for granted (most of the time!).

At this very moment you are steadying yourself on my leg, watching me type. You are just so beautiful JM, and sweet and funny.

You are so loved.

Miracles do happen

Nothing short of a miracle has transpired here in this very house tonight. I gave the baby his goodnight kiss(es) and put him in his cot. He simply put his head down and went to sleep. No crying, not thrusting little arms up in the arm in a "pick me up Mummy don't be so cruuueelll" manner. I left the room and dared not hope.

Then I put the toddler to bed after his serve of Mum kisses. No leaping out of bed immediately, no running into the loungeroom exclaiming "NO NIGH NIGHS!! NO!". It's all so unfamilar but it's bliss.

Bedtime isn't as horrendous as I may be making out to be really. However, either one or the other, many times both, act up at bedtime fearing they are going to miss out on something really exciting. Sometimes this parenting thing can be hard, but the love that circulates in and around you just thinking about your children makes everything else fade in comparison.

Anyway...

I really must update about the milestones my two little men have been achieving. This blog is serving as a baby book of sorts so I can go back and fill them in when I can be arsed.